Hearing Loss Is Also a Lot About Others
Strained relationships
“I wish that mom had some mercy on us. She is so hard to live with.”
These words were spoken by a lady during a support meeting. They illustrate the helplessness that friends and relatives often feel as they try to relate to a loved one with hearing challenges. Hearing loss becomes fast a family affair.
Yet, as people with hearing loss get stuck in denial or even go on the defensive, family, friends and coworkers eventually tire of investing time and energy trying to make things work. Before long, social and business relationships become seriously strained. Don’t let that happen!
Accept and appreciate help
Those around us have no way of understanding the communication challenges, the fears and unwelcome life changes that hearing loss brings. It is painful for them to watch someone struggle while refusing to talk about the issue, to be tested or declaring everyone a critic. Suddenly, there is plenty of resentment and frustration on all sides.
I remember the day when my husband mentioned that we had to find a support group where people would understand what ate away at me. We needed help, he said. At the time, I was grateful for the suggestion because, frankly I was at wit’s end. We did find a support group and life changed for the better.
Reality Check: It was not all about me.
Meeting my hearing-loss peers became a time of introspection. I had ignored those who tried to understand and help me. I did not appreciate the forwarded articles on hearing loss, the internet links on research, the ads on devices and resources, the offers to get me out of the house as the world was closing in on me, the emails and calls asking how I was doing…
I realized that I had become a tad hard to live with. Yet, this was not all about me. It was also a lot about others. Their lives were also affected by my struggles and behavior.
Journey to acceptance and healing
In support meetings I met many whose challenges by far outpaced mine. I became a lot wiser and got a different outlook on hearing loss and on life with it. Besides the serious reality check, I received words of wisdom and of peace along with plenty of coping skills. Mostly, I learned a lot—and so did my husband. Yes, we learned about hearing loss but we also learned about ourselves as we set out on the Journey of acceptance and healing.
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For presentations on hearing loss or Hearing Safety Training, please contact me through this website or email [email protected]
To learn more about hearing loss, see my book “What Did You Say?” now in its second, updated edition. Sharing my story and what I had to learn the hard way.